othelladub's Diaryland Diary

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No Doubt at Don Jose's

I want to buy gifts for people this week. Part of it must be valentine's day, but most of the impetus stems from my unique capacity for fascination with people's reactions to strange things I introduce into their lives.

I love sitting outside of a conversation between two people - interjecting an insignificant comment - and watching how that sprays the conversation in an entirely different direction. I do my part to keep things interesting.

It doesn't always work, of course.But when it does, it gives me a feeling that there are still stones left unturned; things worth discovering. Last night I watched the Superbowl in three different locales. Started off watching at home. Drove up to the bank, got some cash. Stopped at McDonald's. Quarter-Pounder with cheese. Came home. Watched a bit more. Bored. Rams up 3-0. Told people at this bar - the Tavern-that I would stop by. Not that they care, but I am a man of my word. Stopped by, had a beer. Watched 5-10 mins of game. Orgasmic excitement. Told Shane earlier that I would stop by his work. Left tavern. Drove to Hilton in Costa Mesa. Game was more exciting on the radio, somehow. Listened to a talk-show part of the way. Even the talk-show hosts were watching the superbowl. They made a comment about how they only had "4 listeners," and everyone else was watching the superbowl.

Arrived at Hilton. Shane had told me that last year, the bar was dead. This year it was packed. Hundreds of people. Literally. At least more than a hundred. He was slammed, and the game was already winding down. Said "hi," had my ticket validated,promptly left. Started driving up bristol. Turned left on Sunflower. Rams tie the game. This baby's going to overtime!

"Did you know, Steve, that there has never been an overtime game in Superbowl history!!?!!"

Turn left past South Coast Metro. Vinateri kicks game-winning field goal. I won't make it home for overtime. Damn. I was so looking forward to watching this game in four different places, at four distinct snapshots in time. It would've only been three, really, but whatever -

Get home. Watch a little postgame Superbowl. Jack into internet. Read friends' journal entries. Time passes. Friend arrives home.

Hit "Suds & Spirits" - local watering hole.

Listen to friend and local acquaintance ask bartender about the intricacies of her private parts. Back and forth banter, hijinks ensue.

Close out bar. Bar closes early at Midnight. Head to Green Girl Saloon. Friend and Bartender meet up there. Play pool for two hours. Slop counts.

Notice that bikini clad bartender in green girl is swapping spit with black miniskirted vixen, seconds before aforementioned vixen departs.

If I was a blonde with nice boobs who worked in a bikini bar, I'd be a lesbian too. Tips must be great, but I imagine it gets cold. And old, to have guys scanning your physical topography for the duration of an 8 hour shift.

Begin drive home. Can't drive stick. Roommate navigates. Attempts to stay between lines. Stop at Jack-in-the-Box, next to my work. 2 Monster tacos and a sprite. Arrive home. Plug into internet. Check e-mail, fantasy stats. Consider buying Typee or Omoo, early works of Herman Melville. Log off.

Have dream with Gwen Stefani and No Doubt. They are parked in my driveway, about to depart. I ask them when they are playing "Taco Tuesdays" next. Tony Kamal responds. "Yeah, we used to play small joints like that ..." The guy who gets naked tells me that they don't miss it. Sorry, exhibitionist-guy - I will remember your name soon. Dream shifts into acid-laced, surrealist, sexual groping of aforementioned stefani girl.

Groggy. Can't find my wallet. Thought occurs that a "No Doubt" comic would probably sell. Get the right artist, strap 'em all up with jetpacks, and you've just made the WIZARD hot 100 list! Now, about getting the rights ...

11:30 a.m. - 2002-02-04

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